Bougie and Saved

We live in a world where people create rules for other people to live by because of their own insecurities

 Recently I got a DM from a dear friend of mine, my gorgeous girl Tiffany. We were talking style and fashion. She gave me one of the sweetest compliments ever which spark this article. Bougie & Saved — How To Elevate Your Life Experience. To start this conversation I MUST say that the first thing we need to understand that nothing can come before God. Not our hobbies, interests, relationships, collectibles, NOTHING. 

  Matthew 6:24, "No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money".

 With that being said, I want to be clear that this post is not influencing you to idolize anything of this world. At the same time I want to bring understanding that we are allowed to have nice things and enjoy the finer things in life. 

  Psalm 37:4, which states, "Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart".

  Let’s dive into it. Elevating your life experience looks different for everyone. For some it’s a detailed skincare routine or investing in acres of land. The spectrum is board for this type of thing. Whatever your preferences are you shouldn’t feel bad for enjoying the finer things. For example, my family and I enjoy eating out. We enjoy finding a nice restaurant in the city and exploring their menu and then rave about it for the next week until we find our next spot to dine at. Some people may look at me insanely for spending more time in a restaurant than in the kitchen but as for The Goodley family, this is what excites us. Another example of elevation with simple life pleasures is investing in your wardrobe. I’ve mentioned before that Jonathan is now working in the fashion field again. We can already tell by the way our outfit planning for A/W is going that we’ll be investing into finer wear. Better quality trousers for myself because I prefer a good work pants as casual wear, embroidered button down shirts because there is nothing like a personalized item that makes the outfit YOU, and everyday blazers because it’s cooler outside. It would be easier to run to a fast fashion store and buy these pieces (which I have done before and have enjoyed those items) but having the experience of tailored to you and personal quality clothing is elevation that makes walking around the town a better feeling for me. Does this make me better than anyone? Absolutely not, never will but does it enhances my confidence? Absolutely so and that’s exactly what it’s about. Being able to enjoy the things you love and not short yourself out of guilt is a skill we all need to master. 

 I think when we hear the term “Comparison is the thief of happiness” we only look at it from one stand point. The point of view of someone who is comparing themselves to someone else who is doing ‘better’ than they are. What about when it is flipped? I have seen instances where wealthier folks try to be relatable and down play their wealth which leads them to becoming completely unlikable and unauthentic. Then on the other side of that, Morgan Stewart and Chloe Beth are two extremely wealthy influencers who do not hide their wealth or compare themselves to anyone. We live in a world where people create rules for other people to live by because of their own insecurities. Rules that aren’t backed by the Bible especially. Social media created a space for parasocial relationships where people think they know it all about someone. Someone will post that they’ve invested in a new house and car and here comes the comments, “Well did you donate into a charity?” I always wanted to comment back and say, “Well, did you?” I think it’s absurd because people are hardly happy for the next person especially when said individual is simply elevating their experience of life. 

  I mentioned ‘shorting yourself’ so let’s dig into that as well. Let’s keep in mind that my family and I are in the season of elevation, not by our might but by the favor of God. We’ve done the work and we’re faithfully serving Jesus Christ daily. With that being said, today we went into Gap. I saw a sweater I loved at first sight and my first thought was like “Eighty Dollars?! I can probably get that on SHEIN.” Then the thought hit me, “Yes you can but for $10 you’ll have one wear, good luck.” I immediately felt convicted, YES convicted because I know the promises God has for me and the blessings He is preparing me for and here I am shorting myself of something as simple as a good sweater. One that I know I’ll get plenty of wears out of. Just imagine me getting the $10 sweater and have to purchase it six more times instead of making that investment and have a phenomenal product that I can wear over ten times!

 I believe we do short ourselves because of guilt. “There’s people out here without this and without that.” When I am aware of that and the everyday struggles of people, I do believe it is how you care for and the type of person you become when you step into the season of elevation that matters. Are you being wasteful and arrogant or are you being humble and grateful? The guilt of having is one that I will no longer fall for especially because God has delivered me from vanity and materialism. Investing into and having nice things does not make you a bad person. Your intentions behind it does affect your experience of elevation though. Remember what God gives, He can take away as well. 

The Bible verse, Matthew 6:33 “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” means exactly what it says. When you put God in front of everything, He will bless you with everything! Another scripture to back this claim of mine is Matthew 7:11 “If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him!" 

 It is all about your heart posture when you’re deciding to elevate this experience of life. Your character and your intentions must be pure and Christ must come first always. Above all things. Enjoying the finer things in life shouldn’t come with guilt and if it does, you need to reevaluate somethings. So yes, show up bougie but still fight for your salvation my Darlings. 

 I love you so much and prepare yourself for elevation but remember with that you’ll have to get rid of somethings. 

With love, Dani.